Usually my dad and brothers do the equipment maintenance for
the farm. Occasionally, however, they
take a piece of equipment into town for some work. The other day I drove the backhoe home from
the machinist. My route included a
moderately busy highway so I relied heavily on the rearview mirror in my slow
moving vehicle.
Though mirrors prove very helpful, reflections can also be
incredibly disorienting because they show a certain perspective rather than a
literal and accurate portrayal. For
example, the image in my backhoe mirror had a large hoe shaped blind spot. Also, vehicles appearing far away and
indistinct in my mirror flew around me soon after proving that I couldn’t
always trust the depth I saw. I needed
to study that mirror, but I also needed to remember that its portrayal didn’t
show me everything.
Similarly, our own reflections about our past experiences;
our own stories, show a certain perspective.
Our values, friends, education, gender, race, even something as simple
as where we live influence our perspective heavily. Mark Labberton writes in his book The Dangerous Act of Loving Your Neighbor,
“… Everything we see passes through invisible lenses of perception that take a
lot of the information the eye receives and the brain sorts, and place it
within the framework of our experience or understanding or plausibility… We
move seamlessly from sight to perception, from the information available to the
assignment of value and meaning to what we see.” Whether we acknowledge it or not, we bring this perspective shaped by our past, into every interaction.
Even with limitations, what I saw in my backhoe mirror was
imperative, for my safety as well as the safety of everyone else on the road. I needed to take a good look at what was
behind me. In fact, becoming aware of the unique perspective of my rear view
mirror gave me more information about what actions I could take to be a safer
operator on the road.
Since past experiences shape perception, take a look at your
own stories. Notice patterns in your
reflections that reinforce engrained self-perception. How do
you self-identify? Are you martyr, hero, forgotten, cherished…? Look for
the unique characteristics in your review mirror that influence the way you see
the world, and your place in it.
The way we see affects the way we act; with our families and
friends, our co-workers, even random strangers. How have past experiences shaped your pattern of dealing with conflict?
What in your rearview
mirror needs adjusting?
As I drove the slowly jogging backhoe down the road I was
more concerned than usual about the landscape behind me. Several times I had to
remind myself to look ahead and pay attention to what was coming. As comforting, as necessary as it is to know
what’s behind, becoming too engrossed there could also mean danger.
Look in your rear
view mirror, look at your mirror; just don’t get stuck there.
